I did something a little wacky. I submitted an article for publication in Brevity Magazine. Now that I’m thinking about it, I don’t know what is crazier: Submitting the article or telling you about all it. The thought of both is making me a little queasy right now.
I submitted a short, non-fiction story. And as I think back to when I first started this blog; I would have never had the courage to do something like this. I barely have it now. When it comes to writing, I am still in a constant state of anxious indecisiveness with every blog post. My “revision” counter for this one has capped out at 25. Should I hit the publish button? Could I make it better? How do I make it better? Is it good enough? Am I good enough?
Those questions combined leads to a bigger one. Is the potential literary reward worth the risk of putting yourself out there? That is a big gamble. The idea of having something published is a huge, massive thing. I don’t care if 5 or 50000 people read the magazine. That is the reward. But, the risk of rejection? This soon into my writing venture? The thought of taking a chance and ending up with a bruised ego, and one that is already a bit blemished I might add, has me reeling. And worried I may have made a mistake.
While the graphic reads “How to”, it may be better read “How to???.” I guess first things first, I should probably start by managing my expectations. State my goal and get myself mentally prepared for the probable repudiation. Now you see, here I feel like I should type something like “Oh, I’m not expecting much. Maybe just some feedback”. In fact I did type something similar to that. I had to delete it. It wasn’t the truth. Obviously, I’m expecting something. I would have never wasted my time or the $3.00 it cost to submit it if I wasn’t. But then again, perhaps “expecting” is the wrong word. I think “hopeful” is more apt in this situation. It’s better to be hopeful than expectant in most things. I am expecting a response. I am hopeful that it is one of acceptance and not of rejection. That’s my goal. Yes, that’s much better.
However this pans out, I really wanted to write about it. This blog has made me think about things in ways I haven’t before. Never in my life have I set personal goals for myself or stepped so far out of my comfort zone. I’ve never put myself in a position for open critique. Not like this anyway. And even if no one reads these posts. I like to think that it keeps me honest. It keeps me aspiring to do something or be something more. Take risks. I really love what this has turned into. And if that’s all this ever is, just something I enjoying doing, then that’s ok. But I really hope that I never lose the desire to try for something bigger.
Goals:
Have my non-fiction short story published on in Brevity Magazine
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